Sadly for too many people they don’t really feel love or loved. They feel alone, sad or hurt by past experiences. And at Valentine’s Day when we are bombarded with the suggestion that we should be in a “happy couple” and that there’s something wrong if you’re not it’s especially challenging.

Well in this article I’d like to share with you ways that you can create more love, the purest, most blissful source of love. And you’ll discover why love hurts and how to stop it hurting.

Let’s start by explaining what love is

Some people try to define it by how it feels, others by the kinds of relationships that we can feel love in. For example romantic love, platonic, parental love, the love we feel for our children. And they define each type of relationship as having different kinds of love.

But what if the relationship had nothing to do with what love really is?

Wouldn’t it be amazing if the love you feel is completely separate from anything going on outside of you, who you were with, or what you were doing?

In a moment I’m going to show you how this could be.

So let’s imagine that love is nothing more than a form of energy. Like electricity

And just as electricity flows through wires and cables, love travels through channels in your body. I’m going to call these channels your neurology. What’s your neurology? It’s basically your nervous system that carries information around your entire body. It goes way beyond the brain too by the way.

So love is a kind of energy. What kind of energy? I’m going to go out on a limb here and suggest that it’s as close to pure source energy as you can get in the body.

So when you feel love, what you are feeling is the unfettered rush and flow of pure source energy within your body. And it feels GREAT! Indeed this might be the reason we have bodies – so we can feel love flowing through them.

Romantic love – would simply be the experience of source energy moving in the body as triggered by the connection to another person, who also has source energy in their body.

Platonic love – would be the feeling of source energy moving triggered by a friend.

So why does love hurt?

Well the hurt you feel is actually the resistance to love.

Just like an electrical circuit, components in the circuit can have a purpose. It makes a light bulb glow, or a motor run. This is how love motivates us to make changes in our lives and the world. And it is the single most powerful motivating force in the universe.

However when something is introduced to the circuit that resists the flow of love and creates no useful purpose we feel that as emotional pain. Just as certain elements in an electrical circuit can block the flow of electricity in such a way that it simply heats up, catches fire or blows a fuse.

When love is blocked, this is what happens in our bodies, and we feel it as emotional pain.

What blocks the flow is tension in the body. This tension is caused by the difference between what we want (inside of ourselves, and what we experience in the physical reality.

I’ll cover that in more detail in our next issue so make sure you look out for that.

For now – to increase love remember that regardless of what is happening outside of you in terms of your relationships, those circumstances don’t need to affect how much love flows within you.

And remember that all pain is simply the resistance to love. Resist less, love more.

I love you

Lisa

If this sounds like an approach you would like to explore and would like to discuss it further, then apply for a free introductory consultation to discuss your personal situation.
Ask The O Coach your question here.

Masculine energy is Rational Thought, Logic, Systems, Process, Control, Heat, Stillness, Light, Discipline, Steady State, Status quo, Consciousness, Structure, Order. It says “NO”

Feminine energy is Creative, Inspired, Raw Power, Cool, Dark, Movement, Change, Flexibility, Chaos, Intuition, Permitting, Dynamic. It Say’s YES

For example, a project will be a success if you take inspired creativity (feminine energy) and channel it systematically, with a logical plan (masculine). The result is you have fabulous finished project.

But when the balance is out the result could be very different.

Here are some of the signs your energy is out of balance.

Too Much Feminine Energy

• Fuzzy thinking, you can’t concentrate, start things but then get distracted and fail to finish things. Is your home or office full of unfinished projects
• You can’t focus, you have lots of projects on the go at the same time
• You say yes to things and later regret it.
• You find it really difficult to make decisions, and agonise over them for days, weeks or months.
• You are disorganised, lose things forget things have a “head like a sieve”. Sometimes you can’t even remember what you said in a meeting yesterday or last week.
• Your life is rather chaotic, with your days lacking structure or plans

Too Much Masculine Energy

• You find it very hard to take risks, even if you know it’s the right thing and miss great opportunities as a result. Have you ever kicked yourself for saying no to something that later turned out to be a great idea?
• You like to have everything planned out to the last detail. You get very stressed when you have to change your plans at short notice or if there isn’t a plan.
• When circumstances change and you need to adapt, change you often don’t notice until it’s too late.
• Others accuse you of being rigid, Inflexible or a stickler for rules.
• You like to know the “rules” and what’s expected. You can’t stand it when things seem to be disorganised or if others are making it up as they go along.
• You regularly try to make changes in your life, but things just go back to how they were.

Signs You Have Low Energy Generally

• You try to manifest money, or things but it never works
• Others don’t listen or ignore you. You lack power, authority and presence.
• At the end of the day you have been really busy and are exhausted but have little or nothing to show for it.
• You attract lots of interest and attention but it’s often from people who you really don’t want to be around. You find them repellent, but can’t seem to shake them off as they stick to you like glue and keep showing up wherever you go.
• Your personal relationships aren’t working or nonexistent.
• You try to get the attention of people who you know will be able to help you and they give you the brush off, you can’t connect with them.
• You are very spiritual but find it hard to bring your spiritual insights into physical reality. You have great spiritual wisdom, but no-one will listen to you.

But when you’re energy is working, and you can maintain a dynamic balance of both polarities success becomes almost inevitable

Here is just a sampling of what is possible if your sexual energy is functioning exquisitely.

• Would you like to be highly creative and able to channel your creativity into successful and profitable projects?
• Would you like to finally get organised so that you know where things are and don’t waste time?
• You would like to be fully in your body and feel alive in the present moment.
• Would you like to just KNOW if an opportunity is a good one or not, and be able to take decisive action?
• Would you like to be able to focus with laser clarity so that you could get things DONE?
• Would you like to have crystal clarity of mind so that you can think logically, rationally and clearly? It’s this that makes it possible to make good decisions and get things done
• Would you like to manage your time better so that every day you achieve something extraordinary and can feel satisfied at the end of the day?
• Do you wish you could just make snap decisions that are the rights ones without agonising over them?
• Do you wish you could be more spontaneous and have more fun?
• Would you like to have the “Midas touch” and create amazing coincidences all the time? would you like to experience amazing LUCK and good fortune
• Would you like to be able to say NO to things (and the right things)
• Do you wish people would listen to you, seek you out and have them hang on your every word. Can you imagine what it would be like to have people flock to hear you, see you, talk to you, be near you?
• Would you like to attract and keep your soul mate and have the relationship be fulfilling and satisfying on every level?
• Do you wish you could magnetise money?

Well who wouldn’t? find out how it’s possible click here

When people crave better sex, it’s not the physical feeling that they want to intensify what they really crave is a deeper more intimate loving connection. Transmuting sexual energy from lust up to love and exchanging that love with your partner is what will set your sex life on fire.

Managing Sexual energy can improve all aspects of your sex life and solve many problems including: loss of libido, premature ejaculation, impotence, anorgasmia.

1. More and Better orgasms

Most people think it is arousal that triggers orgasm, however, orgasm is triggered when enough sexual energy has been raised. The more sexual energy you can raise the easier you will find it to achieve orgasm.

Some people can achieve orgasm but only small or weak ones. This is because they haven’t learnt to hold a high charge of sexual energy before it is released. Learning how to manage your sexual energy and harness and transmute it will increase the length and intensity of your orgasms.

2. Full body orgasms

Most people have orgasms that are localised only in their genital and pelvic area. When you transmute your sexual energy at the point of orgasm you can move it up your body so that your normal genital orgasm is felt throughout your body.
And even better than that, transmuting makes it possible to lengthen your orgasm almost indefinitely. One woman reported sustaining her orgasm for 23 minutes!

3. Solve impotence

If there’s no physical problem, impotence is always an issue of sexual energy, emotions and self esteem. Learning to raise sexual energy and hold a charge will enable you to achieve and sustain longer and harder erections. You will also be attractive sexually alluring to women. One of my clients is in his 70s and still enjoys a very successful sexual life.

4. Solve Premature Ejaculation

Orgasm is triggered by sexual energy. Once it reaches a certain level orgasm is triggered. In men this is then followed by ejaculation, which is actually a different and separate process to orgasm, and it’s possible to separate them and orgasm without ejaculation.

Premature ejaculation is solved when you learn to transmute sexual energy away from the genitals and up your body. This lowers the charge in your genitals thus delaying ejaculation. It is possible to sustain an erection and penetration almost indefinitely when you master this.

5. Increase Sex Drive and Libido

Low sex drive is due to low sexual energy or sexual energy being stuck and suppressed.

Little blue or white pills might solve the physical problem in men (and women too) but it doesn’t increase desire.

Learn to access more sexual energy and you will find your arousal, desire and libido increasing. It will also increase the amount of lubrication in post menopausal women.

6. Solve Anorgasmia And Find Your Orgasm.

An estimated 50% of women have never or rarely achieve orgasm. This can damage their relationships, their self esteem and their confidence. Not to mention that it means they can’t access their sexual power.

Up to 80% of women who learn to harness and transmute sexual energy solve anorgasmia within 6 – 12 weeks, even when they have been struggling to solve the problem with other methods for years.

7. Living Orgasmically

Sadly most people experience their sex lives as being separate from the rest of their life. They don’t experience sexual energy in their work, relationships, friendships or hobbies. This is because they don’t know how to access sexual energy without desire.

When you master the techniques of sexual energy you can experience the state of bliss usually only associated with peak orgasmic experiences as an ongoing way of being all the time. This is known as living orgasmically and brings bliss into your work, your life, and your relationships.

You will feel more present, more alive, more attractive, and more vibrant. You will have more energy, more drive, more creativity more success and be able to create more abundance in your life.

For free instant access to discover how you can harness and transmute your sexual energy www.energytransmutation.com/infocall

By Dr. Lisa Turner

There is a big difference between sexual energy, and sexual desire. You can have sexual energy without desire, but not desire without sexual energy. What is even less well known is just how important sexual energy is for our health, wealth and success.

1. It Can Bring Your More Money

Have you noticed that rich and powerful men get more sex? Have you noticed how they seem to get more girlfriends, mistresses, and prettier wives?

Most people think that it’s their wealth and power that attracts the girl, but it’s actually their high sexual energy that attracts their wealth and power. They attract their partners, wives and girlfriends with their sexual energy rather than their money and power.

2. Achieve your ideal Weight

Sexual energy is the most potent available in the body, yet most people don’t know how to access it. Most food cravings are triggered by low energy, or emotional eating.

With access to more energy and more connection to your inner self and physical body you will have fewer or no cravings, and will naturally choose healthy foods. Your energy levels will rise as your appetite falls. Your metabolism will increase and your weight will stabilise at a level that creates maximum health, energy and vitality.

3. Improves physical health

Having more orgasms improves your physical health. Women who have regular orgasms have reduced incidents of heart disease, and certain cancers.

Men who ejaculate more regularly are less likely to suffer from prostate cancer.

In addition to the documented boosts to health as a result of regular sex, harnessing and transmuting sexual energy improves vitality, increases feelings of wellbeing. You experience more energy are more motivated. You will enjoy your body more including moving your body and exercising.

As you increase your awareness of your energy and how different foods affect your energy levels you will find it easy to naturally choose more healthy options. Your body will tell you what foods it wants and needs

4. More success

Factors that increase your success are: inner strength, ability to take responsibility and control, energy, charisma, ability to think clearly, emotional resilience and your ability to feel emotions positively rather than negatively, your ability to take good decisions and act decisively.

Raising and harnessing sexual energy increases all of these factors which will increase your success.

5. More sales

Napoleon Hill included a whole chapter on the Mystery of Sex transmutation and its importance for increasing sales.

People buy from people they like and feel good around. A large part of what makes a salesperson likable is their energy. When you have great energy it will make others feel great around you. You will naturally put people at ease, make them feel comfortable. The more comfortable they feel, the more they feel able to trust you, the more you make them feel good about being associated with you the more they will buy.

6. Better leadership abilities

Great leaders have strong sense of SELF. It’s this that attracts people who resonate with you and want to be around you and want to be in your “tribe”.

This strong sense of self gives you the confidence to shout about what you stand for and to be completely OK if some people reject your message.

Transmuting sexual energy increases your sense of self and makes you the leader that people aspire to be and be around. You will lead by example and make people feel good when they are around you. The better you make others feel the more likely they will follow you and the better leader you will be.

For free instant access to discover how you can harness and transmute your sexual energy www.energytransmutation.com/infocall

9 Ways to Help Her Achieve Orgasm.

An estimated 50% of women rarely or never achieve orgasm. If your partner is one of these here are some simple and easy ways to unlock the mystery of the female orgasm. 

1.  Take the Pressure off Her. Do NOT ask “Did you come?”

If her orgasm becomes the “end goal” or sole purpose for having sex this will put ENORMOUS pressure on her. Pressure to achieve orgasm or to “perform” will STOP her relaxing enough to have an orgasm. 

Many men think that they are failing in some way, or less of a man if their partner does not come. If your ego or feelings are linked to your girlfriend’s orgasm it will only put more pressure on her. If she loves you (and I’m assuming she does) she will want you to feel good and to please you. Don’t make her feel like she is failing you if she can’t come. That would only put more pressure on her. Some women even fake it to take the pressure off and to please their partners. Instead make pleasure, fun and intimacy the purpose of making love. 

2.  Take the Pressure off Yourself

If your partner cannot achieve orgasm don’t take it personally. There are many reasons why women can’t orgasm and it is most likely nothing to do with the size of your penis, how long you can last or your sexual prowess. Although technique is important, this is something that you can easily learn.  Most importantly don’t let her lack of orgasm stop you enjoying making love together. 

3.  You Can’t Give Her an Orgasm Only She Can Take One

Many men will proudly boast about the great orgasms the “give” their partner. But the truth is that no one can GIVE anyone an orgasm. All you can do is create the right conditions. Like gardening, you dig the earth, prepare the soil, water the seeds, but in the end it’s the plant that does the growing. In the same way, make her feel safe, comfortable, relaxed, give her permission to enjoy her body (and yours) and then just wait and see. 

4.  Give Her Space and Permission to Learn Her Own Body

If your girlfriend has never achieved orgasm before then she will need the space, privacy and support to practice on her own. She needs to learn how her own body works, feels and responds and she will be much more comfortable doing this on her own. Encourage her to practice, self pleasure and masturbation. Give her space to do this. Go out, and if you have kids take them out too.  Let her know that this is HER time.  Encourage her to have a “date” with herself. When she finally does achieve orgasm – she will feel so proud of herself and happy. Make sure you celebrate it too. Don’t allow your feelings of wishing you had been the one to give her the orgasm get in the way of HER pleasure. 

Once she can achieve orgasm easily on her own, it’s then time for her to show you how it’s done. And then the fun really starts. 

5.  Foreplay, Moreplay, and Get Clirtorate

Learn the language of her body. Learn about her sexual response. The male and female sexual responses are VERY different so learn those differences. These are covered in our online course Ecstatic Living, but here are two important ones.

a) Timing

Touch, stroke, kiss and caress other body parts for at least 15 minutes before you even attempt to touch her genitals. Particularly for a woman it takes at least 15 minutes for the sex hormones to be distributed around her body in sufficient quantities for her to feel aroused. If you rush it not only will she not be ready, she will likely feel invaded. Wait to be invited. 

b) The clitoris, it’s a sensitive subject

The clitoris has TWICE as many nerve endings as the penis and over a smaller area. When you think you are using about the right amount of pressure, use even LESS. Feather soft strokes with the fingertips are perfect. If she wants you to press harder she will let you know. 

6.  Get Intimate

Yes women love orgasms, but intimacy can be just as important. Many women can achieve orgasm alone (and you’ll have to ask her about this) but not when you are present. The reasons for this are usually around her self confidence and the level of intimacy she is comfortable with. Make her feel really comfortable in your presence. The way to do this is to be really comfortable in your own presence, and have great presence. 

7.  Masculine Energy

Many pre-orgasmic women have an excess of male energy. This makes her overly rational and logical. She can get stuck in her head and thoughts rather than her intuition and in her body. This can cause her to shut off from her sexuality.  For her to achieve orgasm she will need to raise her feminine energy, and although you can’t do that for her, you can make it feel safer for her to move into that feminine essence. Raising your own masculine energy will help her do this. Develop your inner strength and learn more about raising masculine energy.

A woman likes to feel comfortable and safe with her man. The best way you can do this is for YOU to be comfortable in and with yourself. 

8.  Soul Connection

The secret to great sex has nothing to do with the physical body. It is actually all about the emotional and spiritual connection between two people. At orgasm the ego (lower self) is surrendered. When you know how to exchange your sexual and orgasmic energy you will truly be making love and connecting at a spiritual level. The experience of this goes way beyond any physical pleasure and is exquisite bliss.

Sex is the barometer of how healthy a relationship is and it is the glue that binds it together.

9.  Sex Magic

Sex magic is said to be a highway to higher consciousness. When a couple have great sex at a soul level it not only strengthens the relationship it strengthens the individuals.

Really successful people have a very strong relationship and a good sex life is an essential part of that. Learning about sexual energy not only improves your sex life and your relationship it transforms all areas of your life too.

To Your Bliss

By Dr. Lisa Turner

For a free audio on how sexual energy and sex magic, including more info on the full body orgasm, click here.

So we know this is “normal” but why does it happen and what can you do about it?

Sex is the glue that binds a couple together and the barometer of how well the relationship is doing.

It’s also the barometer of the levels of sexual energy within an individual. The reasons one person is attracted to another are complex but at the root of it is sexual energy, and sexual charge.

Within the body there is a polarity of sexual energy. Men have masculine energy in the head, and feminine energy in the genitals, women have the opposite, feminine energy in the heard, and masculine energy in the genitals.

It is this opposite polarities that causes the attraction and sexual charge.

For both men and women, these polarities flip at orgasm.

In addition men lose a vast amount of sexual charge. Most people don’t know how to recharge their sexual energy and so over time they both become depleted and then find their partner less attractive. The magnetism has gone, the sexual charge depleted.

At best this results in a platonic relationship, at worst infidelity results as one or other becomes attracted to the high sexual charge of the other.

By learning to re-charge yourself sexually you will become, once again magnetically attractive to your mate. Recharging your sexual batteries is the best way to maintain and even improve not only your sex life, but also your relationship.

Laughing with Gandhi. 2nd Installment of my book

Releasing the resistance to pain will release the discomfort. Resistance equals judgement.

Indulge me for a moment whilst I briefly mention pain and compassion. We need pain. Pain or the discomfort that lies between where we are and what we would choose causes us to move towards what we would choose. It is that pain, or tension that pulls us forward. When we feel pain, what we feel is the tension between our current experience and what we would like to experience.

As an engineer I regularly find myself saying “there must be a better way of doing that”. It is that desire to seek something better that creates new discoveries and inventions. Thomas Newcomen wanted to pump water out of a tin mine a little more easily, so he crafted the Beam Engine in 1712

Then along came Mrs. Watt’s boy Jimmy (James Watt). He was always messing about making things and took a look at Newcomen’s engine and added a few bits to it that massively increased its efficiency. (go to Crofton, Wiltshire, UK, to see a wonderful working example of one dating from 1812).

So clever were he and his mate Matt (Mathew Boulton) that together the made rotational motion possible, thus leading to the development steam engine used in trains. That lead, via a few dead ends, u-turns and re-engineering to the internal combustion engine, the automobile. Just listen to that a word Auto (without effort) mobile (to move).

Just because Tommy Newcomen played with water as a kid near the tin mines of Cornwall.

His work was intended to stop people, miners, from getting wet. The pain of getting wet – or drowning or being prevented from getting to the best strains of tin led to all kinds of discoveries. Yes my friends, pain is important. Pain is the tension between where you are and where you want to be.

Every time you want something, every time you desire something better or different, every time you say to yourself “Not this!” you might feel that pain. It is the discomfort of recognising that where you are, and what you are experiencing is not what you want.

When you are in a relationship that hurts, the pain you feel is the tension between what you have and what you would rather have. Don’t fight the pain; use it to direct yourself to what you want. It tells you that you have settled to low. It is there to push you take action to change something. The mistake many people make is that they use the pain as an excuse for staying where they are. They wear their problems like a medal, as a reason for NOT changing.

Which brings us to compassion. Compassion is the concern we have for another in pain. When another is in pain sometimes we feel it too, especially if it is someone we care about. Compassion for strangers happens when we resonate with their situation. They are like us, we are like them, now or in the past. Their pain is or was our pain. We know what that feels like.

But what we must never do is to deny them the opportunity to move out of it. Help them, or assist them by all means, but when they have asked and take action.

One of the single most important moments of my life was when I left, Neil, my partner of 7 years. I was 2 weeks away from my 20th birthday. As you will read shortly, the relationship was not a healthy one. I had been trapped and isolated in it for years longer than I wanted to be. I felt the pain of where I was, but was powerless (or so I thought) to change it.

I did eventually gather the strength, from really GOD knows where, to leave and move out. I found a grotty bedsit and paid my deposit. I did not drive; my only transportation was my bicycle. My dilemma become “how shall I get my stuff to my new place?”

To this day one of the single most important acts of unselfish kindness was exhibited by my friend Orla Murphy. She offered to borrow her sister’s car and move my stuff. She drove across London from Kensington to Haringey and ferried my boxes and clothes in her tiny Punto through the awful North London Traffic. Three trips was the sum total of my life. On the last trip I rode my bike behind her through the jam.

Eventually settling me in my new digs we had tea in a local cafe. “Are you going to be Ok?” Orla asked.

Thinking back I think she was more aware of my emotions than I was. I was on autopilot. Just get out, get my stuff out, don’t tell him where I’ve gone to and worry about the emotional stuff later.

I waved Orla off and stepped into my new home. I didn’t know what to do with myself. I had no telly to distract me, and although an avid reader I couldn’t settle to a book. I wandered about not knowing where to put myself. None of the chairs or bed felt right. It was all so alien. I sat as if in a trance and didn’t move for about 3 hours. I kept thinking, I’ll get up and do something in a minute, but with nothing TO do I didn’t or couldn’t. It was as if the signals from my brain to my body were not connected. I felt paralysed. Eventually I managed to get myself ready for bed and woke up to begin my journey of recovery.

What has this to do with compassion? We can feel compassion to another, but can only help them when they are ready to help themselves.

Before I made the decision to leave my mum would occasionally say a few derogatory things about Neil. I never became defensive, but I did become a master of pretence. Too ashamed to admit I wasn’t happy, I pretended that Neil and I had the best, most supportive and loving relationship you could imagine. I made up elaborate tales to demonstrate his generosity, kindness and love. Though in truth, I was little more than an imprisoned slave.

Until I was ready to leave, until I had made conscious decision to leave and take the action necessary I couldn’t accept any help. I rejected it preferring to craft a deceptive denial for my own benefit as much as others.

One of the most important things I learn about my experiences has been that without a doubt I would not be here doing what I’m doing and being as awake and evolved as I now am. I say this, not to be arrogant, but to express pride in my own journey to waking up.

People who have led simple, uncomplicated, “happy” lives don’t seem to be as awake as those who have had a few knocks and scrapes. Those knocks and scrapes create compassion. Those who have been in pain know what it is like and our hearts bleed for them.

Some people are cannot feel compassion. They prefer to judge. “Silly girl” “You made your bed so you can lie in it”. My theory about those who can’t feel compassion is this, and it’s pretty simple. At some point in their past they needed compassion. They had made a “mistake” and whilst experiencing the consequences of their choices no compassion was shown. They didn’t have it shown to them when they were in need. They cannot be compassionate even to themselves. Perhaps they can’t forgive themselves for making bad choices and for not making new ones when it came to light that their situation was not as they would choose. Perhaps they were in that state of pain or tension, but felt powerless to move themselves. Who knows?

When we see people who appear to be experiencing a “problem” or who has made a choice that we would not, who are we to judge? When we recognise pain in them that they cannot own fully themselves, they could be experiencing the single most important part of their evolution. It is from this place that I share my story. To this day I still feel my experiences were hugely important for me and thank my mother and father for the support they always offered to me without making my choices for me by exercising what many would call ‘parental control’.

They allowed me to get wet, then handed me a towel.

I got wet!

My mother had a difficult childhood, she suffered with depression much of her life. The feeling I had before I could even talk, was that of suffocating sadness, a quietness that was so empty it felt as though being connected to anything else was impossible.

When I was 18 months old and barely walking our family had a day at the seaside in the North of England. Whilst no one was looking I suddenly stopped playing in the sand and quietly I stood up and walked into the sea. This memory is vague but very present for me. As if in trance my little limbs moved me towards the beckoning depths which called me into the embrace of her smothering, waves. The icy surf tumbled me over and over before I was fetched out. My parents hurriedly wrapped my in any dry clothing they had to hand. By way of observation is said “I got wet”

I repeated this experience almost identically and “got wet” again when I was 2 years old. Once again the sea called and drew me into her embrace. Once again I was called back to rejoin the living on land, my journey on earth not yet complete.

I don’t believe this was a conscious attempt at suicide. Therapists have suggested it was an unconscious one. Spiritual teachers have suggested it was an attempt to return to my spiritual source, to reject this incarnation, as if I knew what a tough life I had chosen and was attempting to re-negotiate my choices.

As I grew older I recall feeling very disconnected from life, a lack of joy produced a curiosity to know what it would be like to no longer exist in the physical form. The conventional view would be to label my suffering childhood depression. I resonate more closely with the spiritual idea that I was unconsciously realising what a hard life I had selected. Like enrolling in an advanced class in mathematics and wanting to drop out because the course work looked a bit tricky.

I’m glad I took this Karma class and chose to evolve. I have infinite compassion for those who have also taken tough options, the advanced course, regardless of whether or not they are doing their homework (taking action). I am compassionate. It took me a long time to wake up, and recognise the struggle that it can be to wake up from the safety of slumber and dreams.

Exercise 1: Where did you get wet? How did you decide that?

Write your life story. The best time to do this is first thing in the morning, even before you are fully awake.

When you have done this, make a list of the significant life events, such as when you moved house, changed job, started a new relationship, ended a relationship, recovered from an illness, or any other significant decision or change.

Even if you were not aware of making the choice consciously, pretend that you made the decision consciously and answer these questions.

What was your intention for making that choice? What did you hope to gain from that? Remember, imagine that it was a conscious choice even if it didn’t feel like it at the time.

What did you NOT choose? What was the action or choice NOT taken? What was the path NOT taken?

For each choice what were you feeling at the time you made those choices? What were your reasons for making that choice? What were your decision criteria for making that choice?

Notice the pattern to your life decision making. You will notice that there has been an underlying theme to what drove you to make those choices and changes in your past. If you do not learn to become conscious of this theme you will continue to make decisions unconsciously. If you are happy with your life, your choices and your decisions this is fine. But if you are not then you will need to become conscious of them in order for you to change them.

For now be happy that you are conscious of how and why you have made your choices.

Until next time

Lisa

p.s. If you liked this let me know.

He called me up for a quickie coaching session to help get himself all excited and raring to go for the challenge.

Listen to the O Coach show Steve how to get to grips with his equipment and mindset.

If you enjoyed this audio – pass the link on. Oh, and remember to donate your £1.

We live in a very “left brain” rational society. Emotions, intuition and feelings are disapproved of, not only in the work place, but in all areas of life.  Life has become about control. Controlling ourselves, every thought, every process, and every action become entirely planned and controlled by our logical mind. Some people try to plan and pilot every aspect of their lives.

But orgasm is NOT under our conscious control. Like sneezes they are controlled by the irrational, unconscious, emotional, intuitive, holistic part of our brains. People who only use logical control find it hard to or even  impossible to let go.

Other symptoms that someone is overly controlling are:

• Inability to have fun.
• Don’t let their hair down.
• Being critical of both themselves and others.
• Being highly organised and unable handle changes of plan easily.
• They might come across as being demanding, extremely particular or fussy.
• They have muscle tension, stiff joints, headaches or migraine
• Nightmares, insomnia or other sleep disturbances.
• Often feel tired even when you know you shouldn’t
• They believe there is a right way and a wrong way to do everything.
• They are often quite pessimistic, or even despondent.

The healing process for these clients focuses on them learning how to relax, and let go and how to surrender to a little chaos.

One of the key factors is to communicate with your unconscious mind. Tap into your intuition if you like. You need to learn to trust their unconscious mind and slowly but surely release the tight hold on control.

Control is an illusion anyway. We can actually control very little. The unconscious mind, although it might seem irrational this is usually because it has much greater processing power so has information that the conscious mind does not. If it is left alone and allowed to do its job, all areas of life can improve.

The solution for this starts with the woman first accepting the need to relax control. Unfortunately they find this very difficult as it might not feel safe for them. Also they are often completely unaware that they are very controlled or even that this is part of the problem.

The clues are often apparent as soon as they contact me, but the number of restrictions they place around and the way of them getting onto a workshop. They will say things like “it has to be in May” or “I can’t do Tuesdays”. They will need to know a lot of specifics about the content and ask for details of my credentials.

Sadly for most of these women they put so many restrictions that they rarely take action to move forward. It is as if they have locked themselves into a cage or are so tightly wrapped up in their “shoulds” and “have tos” that they never even give themselves the freedom to come to see me.

Fortunately those that do come to see me experience fantastic transformations and find that by letting go they actually gain more influence over their lives. And of course, they end up being able to achieve orgasm and harness their energy which also increases their persona power, and effectiveness. Control without power is impotent.

The problem is one of energy and it is too much masculine energy and not enough feminine energy.

Feminine energy is raw power, but it is a little chaotic.

Masculine energy is control, but is can be restrictive

We need both.

Control without power is impotent

Power without control is destructive.

The healing includes things to get them to relax, let go and enjoy a little chaos. Energy work to raise the feminine energy as well as meditation, hypnosis and relaxation techniques. Bodywork to get them out of their head and into their body is also important. Yoga and Chi Gong movement is excellent for this.

If you would like to know how to increase your personal power and influence or you cannot achieve orgasm then contact me          0845 468 1508           lisa@the-o-coach.com

Until next time

Lisa